Responsible Gambling
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Friends and family
Gambling not only affects the person who gambles, but can negatively affect friends and family. Sometimes it is friends and family who seek help on behalf of the gambler.
Identifying a friend or family member who may be experiencing difficulties with gambling.
This is not an exhaustive list but the more these signs seem to fit the person, the more likely it is they need to review or seek help for their gambling behaviour:
Preoccupied with gambling and unable to stop
Spending increasing amounts of time playing on Internet gambling sites or visiting external gambling venues with increasing frequency
Reliving past gambling experiences, planning the next gambling venture, continually talking about new ways to get money
Bragging about gambling, exaggerating wins and minimizing losses
Becoming withdrawn, restless or irritable when attempting to reduce or stop gambling.
Losing interest in other pastimes and hobbies, refusing invitations to attend social events with friends and colleagues
Increasingly spending available free time on gambling activities.
Gambling alone more and more, especially for long periods
Gambling with increasing amounts of money
Gambling to win back money that has been lost
Borrowing money for gambling or in order to pay off gambling debts
That they are finding that after losing money gambling, they continue to gamble in order to get back those losses ("chasing”)
Lying to others in order to conceal the extent of gambling
Unpaid bills and debts
Unexplained absences
Losing work time because of gambling or jeopardizing job by gambling
Doing something illegal to get money for gambling
Ability to control their gambling is lost, and repeated efforts to reduce or stop gambling are unsuccessful.
Family and friends typical reactions to someone with gambling problems
Anger
Shame - embarrassed by the gambler
Hurt - the gambler may blame all the problems on their partner and blame them for their preoccupation with gambling
Fear and worry - not knowing what mood the gambler will be in and uncertainty and worry about finances
Loneliness - feels rejected, unloved.
Recognising the problem and what can be done
You can start this process by:
Acknowledging the problem;
Regaining control of finances, budgeting and maintaining or establishing family routines;
Talking to someone, and accepting support
Planning for you and your family’s emotional needs
Establishing a "safety net" of supportive family, friends and community support agencies
Get counselling.
Dealing with finances:
Establishing separate bank accounts;
Assessing your partner’s access to money;
Knowing your long-term assets and investments;
Determining your average monthly family income and expenses;
Listing all valuable possessions accessible to the gambler;
Knowing what debts you are liable for.
Strategies for how to deal with the behaviour of a gambler
Giving support to someone that has a gambling problem
Support through treatment and recovery
Set boundaries
Communicate
Control cash
Don’t play the blame game
